After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take

another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly

arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would

have an excuse to leave.When he returned to the table, he

lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have

some bad news. My grandfather just died.""Thank heavens,"

his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"

The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a

party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he

said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with

your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."

"Why use my elbow and foot?"

"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-

handed, are you?"

一GG不服气：“不就七十多米嘛……”

却被这个四川MM打断：“才七十多米吗？”

另一人很有把握地说：“是71米。”

“所以说，你们这些人连一些基本常识都不懂”这个MM振振有辞，“人家坐着是71米，那么站起来呢？”

　　　众人跌倒在地……

　　　“你倒是让他站起来呀！”这个GG还是不服气。

　　　“咳，人家在江边一坐就是一千多年，风吹雨淋的，早得关节炎了。有本事你去坐几年试试！” 众人彻底无语了……­

第一个是个色鬼，因此他大喊"女人！女人！"往下一跳果真有满坑满谷的美女正等着他.

　　第二个是个书呆子，喊了"书书书书书！"然后，跳到山谷里也得到满坑满谷的书.

　　第三个是个优柔寡断的人，左思右想总是无法决定自己的最爱，过了一个小时以后，他终于下定决心，觉得还是钞票最有用了，于是他走向山谷边.一不小心踢到一颗石头，他骂了一声"shit！"不料一个重心不稳跌下山谷。